parenting tips

Ten Keys to Positive Parenting

1. Communication

 Have good communication. This requires the active listening and responding of at least two people. Take time to hear what each other is saying.Have good communication. This requires the active listening and responding of at least two people. Take time to hear what each other is saying.

2. Be Supportive 

Show support in a child’s hobbies and interests. Spend time with them on hobbies and encourage exploring their interests.

3. Set Rules 
Have household rules. Make sure the rules are clear for every member of the family. Apart from being clear, see that they follow the rules.

4. Correct your Child 

Teach the difference between right and wrong. When a mistake is made, correct the child, but do not overreact.  Praise freely whenever good is seen.

5. Appreciation
Appreciate the value of play. It is a child’s work. Playing with a child will give a parent a chance to prevent some discipline problems and make it easier (and funnier) for children to learn.

6.Have Family Get Together 

Arrange time for family activities. Children need to have some special time with parents. When there is more than one child in the house, make time for each child individually. Try to make these times special.

7.Healthy Food 
Build a healthy body and brain. Provide healthy food and plenty of water. Avoid junk food. Get active as much as possible. Turn off the television and video games and get outside.

8.Never embarrass your child
Don’t embarrass your child. If you embarrass your child especially in front of others, it will hinder future open talks.

9.Be a Good Listener  
 You need to learn how to listen carefully, not just to the words but the heart. Listening attentively is the key to healthy communication. You can listen actively.  Repeat what the child has said to avoid misunderstanding.

10.Show Interest 
Show a genuine interest in your child and his activities. This would help your child learn to express how he feels. Pay attention when your child talks. Good communication brings mutual understanding.

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How to deal with lying child and teenagers

There may be many reasons why your teen is lying and you need to know the real reason behind the lie. The reason may be wrong crowd or defensive nature. You have to work on the real reason so that you can manage his lying behavior. There may be any reason behind the lying attitude but you may have to face serious consequences because of this attitude. Here is a list of facts that can teach you how to deal with lying teenagers.

First of all you should accept that your teen will lie. This understanding makes the things easy for you and you can confidently deal with your teen. Your objective behavior makes you more aware and you can easily identify when your teen is lying.

• Lying attitude is most commonly associated with defensive nature. If your child becomes defensive during communication then he is lying with you. 

• Maintain an eye contact with your teen for checking his confidence. If he is telling lie then he looks in other directions and avoids eye contact with you. They usually shout for convincing you that they are telling truth.

• Body language and details also reflects the attitude of the lying teenagers.  Teens normally avoid giving details when they are lying or they unnecessarily give you explanation for unwanted things. Their story normally changes every time when you ask them to repeat it again. He also becomes nervous when he is telling lie.

• If it is suspected that your kid is lying then you should give immediate attention for avoiding the worst situation in the future. Make them realize that you trust them and their lie is making the relationship weaker among them. You should not become rude when your teen is telling lie. In fact handle the situation with love and great care. Your rude behavior can encourage him for telling more lies in the future.

• Parents should also teach their teens the meaning of a true and respectful relationship. Parents should also be honest for their teens because children learn a lot from their parents. You can easily make the situation under control if you take hand to take action at that time. Parents should also know how to deal with this tough situation. Your immediate attention can make the situation under control soon and child also tries to give his best for meeting the expectation of the parents.

• You should not jump immediately that your teen is telling lie every time. Analyze the situation carefully and try to understand it deeply. When you are sure about the fact that your teen is telling lie only then you should take some action.

• One you are sure about the reason why teen is telling lie then you should work on the cause so that lying attitude can be avoided in future.

    If any parents see near to all problem in his child then they must think to consult a child psychologist for the proper evaluation and management.


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Peer Pressure on Children and Teenager

Peer Pressure on Children and Teenager

Peer pressure is about being influenced and choosing to do something you wouldn't otherwise do, in the hope of feeling accepted and valued by others. It isn't just about doing something against your will.

Peer pressure can be positive. For example, your child might be influenced to become more assertive, try new activities, or to get more involved with school.

But it can be negative too. Some teenagers might be influenced to try things they normally wouldn't be interested in, such as smoking or taking part in antisocial behavior.

As examples, peer pressure might result in children:

• Choosing the same clothes, hairstyle, or jewellery as their friends.

• Listening to the same music or watching the same TV shows as their friends.

• Changing the way they talk, or the words they use.

• Taking risks or breaking rules.

• Working harder at school, or not working as hard.

•Dating or taking part in sexual activities.

• Smoking or drinking alcohol.

Children who experience poor self-esteem, those who feel they have few friends, and sometimes those with special needs might be more likely to give in to peer pressure. These children might feel that the only way they’ll be included and accepted in social groups is by taking on the behaviour, attitudes and look of a group.

Coping well with peer pressure is about getting the balance right between being yourself and fitting in with your group. 

Children who experience strong self-esteem are better at resisting negative peer pressure. If your child is happy with who he is and the choices he makes, he’s less likely to be influenced by the people around him. Self-esteem helps in establishing good relationships, but good friendships also help self-esteem.

Helping your child manage peer pressure--

You might be worried that your child is being over-influenced by her peers, or that she’s selling out on her values (or yours) to fit in with her friends. You might also be concerned that your child won’t be able to say no if she’s pressured to do more risky things, such as smoking.

But listening to the same music and dressing in the same way as friends doesn't necessary add up to doing the same antisocial or risky things. It’s worth remembering that you have an influence over your child too, especially over the longer term. If your child has a strong sense of himself and his values, it’s more likely he’ll know where to draw the line when it comes to the risky stuff.

Here are some ideas to help your child manage peer pressure:

Keep the lines of communication open. You can do this by staying connected to your child. This can help make her feel more comfortable talking to you if she’s feeling pressured to do something she’s uncomfortable with.

Suggest ways to say no . Your child might need to have some face-saving ways to say no if he’s being pressured to do something he doesn’t want to do. For example, friends might be encouraging him to try smoking, so rather than saying ‘No, thanks’, he could say something like, ‘No, it makes my asthma worse’, or ‘No, I don’t like the way it makes me smell’.

Give teenagers a way out. If your child feels she’s in a risky or high-pressure situation, it might help if she can text or phone you for back-up without worrying you’ll be cranky. If your child’s embarrassed about having to call you, you could agree on a coded message. For example, she could say that she’s checking on a sick grandparent, but you’ll know that it really means she needs a hand.

Encourage a wide social network. If your child has the opportunity to develop friendships from a wide range of sources (such as through sport, family activities or clubs), this will mean he’s got lots of other options and sources of support if a friendship goes wrong.

Build up your child’s sense of self-esteem. This can help her feel more confident to make her own decisions and push back on peer pressure.

When you’re worried about a peer group

Encouraging your child to have friends over and giving them space in your home can help you get to know your child’s friends and be aware if negative peer pressure is becoming an issue. Good communication and a positive relationship with your child might also encourage your child to talk to you if he’s feeling negative pressure from peers.

If you’re worried your child’s friends are a negative influence, being critical of them might push your child into seeing them behind your back. If your child thinks you don’t approve of her friends, she might even want to see more of them. Instead of focusing on any people you don’t like, you can try talking to your child about the behaviour you don’t like. Discuss the possible consequences of the behaviour, rather than making judgments about her friends.

It can be helpful to compromise with your child. For example, letting him wear certain clothes or have his hair cut in a particular way can help him feel connected to his peers, even if you’re not keen on blue hair or ripped jeans.


When to be concerned

If you notice changes in your child’s mood, behavior  eating or sleeping patterns, which you think are because of her friends, it might be time to have a talk with her. Some mood and behavior changes are normal in teenagers, but if they go on for a few weeks, you might start to worry about your child’s mental health.

Warning signs include:

• Low moods, tearfulness or feelings of hopelessness.
• Aggression or antisocial behavior.
• Sudden changes in behavior, often for no obvious reason.
• Trouble eating or sleeping.
• Eluctance to go to school.
• Withdrawal from previously enjoyed activities.                                                                                                                                                                                

        If any parents see near to all problem in his child then they must think to consult a child psychologist for the proper evaluation and management.

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Improve Speech Problem

1-               Practice jaw exercises to enhance clarity of speech                                

1. Make wide chewing motions while humming gently.
2. Stretch every muscle in your jaw and face. Open your mouth as wide as possible (as if you were about to yawn), while moving your jaw in circles, and sideways.
3. Open your mouth wide, as in the previous exercise, and shut it again. Repeat 5 times.

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  2-                     Try tongue twister Exerciser                                                           

Start off slowly, and gradually build up until you say them at normal conversation speed. When speaking them, exaggerate the words, making your tongue, jaw and lips work hard. As you become surer of them, begin to project your voice and exaggerate the words more. This helps you gain skill.

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3-    Have a conversation with yourself in front of the mirror                     

It may sound silly, but it does help. Again, exaggerate your words as you speak

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4-                      Gargle water with a pinch of salt                                                            

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5-               Avoid Speaking with Bad Teeth                                         

   

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6-                  Don't Rush When Speaking                               

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7-                                           Swallow Excess Saliva                                                                                                                                    

Saliva left in the mouth can result in mumbling and distortion of consonants such as "S" and "K"

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Cocentration Problem

Possible causes                                                                                                                        

In younger children, lapses in concentration could be caused by:

 

Lack of sleep

If your child is tired she won't be able to concentrate so put her to bed at a reasonable hour. Aim for her to get about nine hours' sleep a night.

Personal circumstances

Your child will find it easier to concentrate when she is not troubled or anxious about something such as falling out with friends, or is having difficulty getting along with her teacher.

 Motivation and interest

She will be able to concentrate for longer if she's interested in what she's doing.

 Health

A weak immune system, dehydration and bad eating habits could all contribute to poor levels of concentration. Make sure that she takes a multivitamin and mineral supplement every day.

 Surrounding conditions

A lot of activity, noise, or a television that is always on does not contribute to the calm atmosphere that is needed for high levels of concentration.

 Distracted teens

If your teenager's mind is always elsewhere, this could be why:

 Lack of sleep

Encourage teenagers to go to bed and to get up at roughly the same time every day.

 Personal circumstances

Similar to younger children, being anxious or troubled about issues at home or at school, or with friends, could lead to low levels of concentration.

 Lack of motivation

Getting them to be interested in the subject will make a huge difference to their levels of concentration.

 Teacher trouble

When children do not like a teacher or have a problem with a particular teacher, they usually do not perform well.

 Health problems

Concentration could be affected by regular illness due to a lack of medication for a chronic condition such as asthma, or because of a weak immune system and an unhealthy diet.

 Lack of exercise

This could make children lethargic and tired, and they won't be able to concentrate, especially after lunch.

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What is slow learner

Question -What is slow learner? 

Answer :-

 A “slow learner” is not a diagnostic category, it is a term people use to describe a student who has the ability to learn necessary academic skills, but at rate and depth below average same age peers. In order to grasp new concepts, a slow learner needs more time, more repetition, and often more resources from teachers to be successful. Reasoning skills are typically delayed, which makes new concepts difficult to learn. 

Question:-How we identify them?

Answer :-

The characteristics of a slow learner are: 

1. Functions significantly below grade level. 
2. Is prone to immature interpersonal relationships. 
3. Has difficulty following multi-step directions. 
4. Lives in the present and does not have long-range goals. 
5. Has few internal strategies (i.e. organisational skills, difficulty transferring and    generalising information.) 
6. Scores consistently low in achievement tests. 
7. Works well with "hands-on" material (i.e. labs, manipulative activities.) 
8. Has a poor self-image. 
9. Works on all tasks slowly. 
10. Masters skills slowly; some skills may not be mastered at all.

Question : - What I do after my child have slow learning problem  ?

Answer :-

Here are some tips on how to work with slow learners: 

• Reduce distractions by providing a quiet, private place to work. 
• Emphasise strengths. Use lots of praise and reinforcement frequently. 
• Make lessons short. Limit the working time and have several short work periods rather than one long one. 
• Add variety to the academic routine. Do active things and use educational games, puzzles, and other techniques as much as possible. 
• Work on material that is somewhat challenging but allows success. Work that is too hard or too easy is a turn-off. 
• Make learning fun and comfortable. Your positive attitude is very important. 
• Encourage your child to talk to you. Ask what he did in school. Ask what was the best part of his/her day. Ask questions about the TV shows he/she watches. Talk about what he/she has heard, done, and plans to do. Communicate with your students. 
• Go over his/her daily work to reinforce the learning. Slow learners need repetition. 
• Provide meaningful, concrete activities rather than abstract ones. 
• Give short, specific directions and have your child repeat them back to you. 
• READ! Set an example by reading yourself. Read to the student and have the student read to you. 
• Work closely with the teacher to help strengthen academic areas that are weak in school. 
• Stress the importance of education. 
• Encourage the student to explore an area of interest to him/her.

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Language Development in Child

Language Development Index

Age	Language Development Sign....
6-Months	Vocalization with intonation Responds to his name Responds to human voices without visual cues by turning his head and eyes Responds appropriately to friendly and angry tones
12 Months	Uses one or more words with meaning (this may be a fragment of a word) Understands simple instructions, especially if vocal or physical cues are given Practices inflection Is aware of the social value of speech
18 Months	Has vocabulary of approximately 5-20 words Vocabulary made up chiefly of nouns Some echolalia (repeating a word or phrase over and over) Much jargon with emotional content Is able to follow simple commands
24 Months	Can name a number of objects common to his surroundings Is able to use at least two prepositions, usually chosen from the following: in, on, under Combines words into a short sentence-largely noun-verb combinations (mean) length of sentences is given as 1.2 words Approximately 2/3 of what child says should be intelligible Vocabulary of approximately 150-300 words Rhythm and fluency often poor Volume and pitch of voice not yet well-controlled Can use two pronouns correctly: I, me, you, although me and I are often confused My and mine are beginning to emerge Responds to such commands as “show me your eyes (nose, mouth, hair)”
36 Months	Use pronouns I, you, me correctly Is using some plurals and past tenses Knows at least three prepositions, usually in, on, under Knows chief parts of body and should be able to indicate these if not name Handles three word sentences easily Has in the neighborhood of 900-1000 words About 90% of what child says should be intelligible Verbs begin to predominate Understands most simple questions dealing with his environment and activities Relates his experiences so that they can be followed with reason Able to reason out such questions as “what must you do when you are sleepy, hungry, cool, or thirsty?” Should be able to give his sex, name, age Should not be expected to answer all questions even though he understands what is expected
48 Months	Knows names of familiar animals Can use at least four prepositions or can demonstrate his understanding of their meaning when given commands Names common objects in picture books or magazines Knows one or more colors Can repeat 4 digits when they are given slowly Can usually repeat words of four syllables Demonstrates understanding of over and under Has most vowels and diphthongs and the consonants p, b, m, w, n well established Often indulges in make-believe Extensive verbalization as he carries out activities Understands such concepts as longer, larger, when a contrast is presented Readily follows simple commands even thought the stimulus objects are not in sight Much repetition of words, phrases, syllables, and even sounds
60 Months	Can use many descriptive words spontaneously-both adjectives and adverbs Knows common opposites: big-little, hard-soft, heave-light, etc Has number concepts of 4 or more Can count to ten Speech should be completely intelligible, in spite of articulation problems Should have all vowels and the consonants, m,p,b,h,w,k,g,t,d,n,ng,y (yellow) Should be able to repeat sentences as long as nine words Should be able to define common objects in terms of use (hat, shoe, chair) Should be able to follow three commands given without interruptions Should know his age Should have simple time concepts: morning, afternoon, night, day, later, after, while Tomorrow, yesterday, today Should be using fairly long sentences and should use some compound and some complex sentences Speech on the whole should be grammatically correct
6-Years	In addition to the above consonants these should be mastered: f, v, sh, zh, th,1 He should have concepts of 7 Speech should be completely intelligible and socially useful Should be able to tell one a rather connected story about a picture, seeing relationships Between objects and happenings
7- Years	Should have mastered the consonants s-z, r, voiceless th, ch, wh, and the soft g as in George Should handle opposite analogies easily: girl-boy, man-woman, flies-swims, blunt-sharp short-long, sweet-sour, etc Understands such terms as: alike, different, beginning, end, etc Should be able to tell time to quarter hour Should be able to do simple reading and to write or print many words
8-Years	Can relate rather involved accounts of events, many of which occurred at some time in the past Complex and compound sentences should be used easily Should be few lapses in grammatical constrictions-tense, pronouns, plurals All speech sounds, including consonant blends should be established Should be reading with considerable ease and now writing simple compositions Social amenities should be present in his speech in appropriate situations Control of rate, pitch, and volume are generally well and appropriately established Can carry on conversation at rather adult level Follows fairly complex directions with little repetition Has well developed time and number concepts