Problems at school: children 9-15 years

     Problems at school: children 9-15 years

Problems at school : the basics

Ups and downs at school are part of life for many young people. A good relationship with your child’s school and teachers can help you head off problems. If school problems do come up, it’s important that you quickly recognize and address them.

Problems at school can show up as poor academic performance, lack of motivation for school, loss of interest in school work, or poor relationships with peers or teachers.


School difficulties range from minor to severe, might be very short-lived or last for longer.

Common signs of school problems-

•  Drop in marks in one or more subjects.
•  Lack of engagement, connection or involvement with school – for example, your child might not be interested in extracurricular activities or have very few friends.
• Showing embarrassment or discomfort when talking about school.
• Refusing to talk with you about school, or rarely talking about school with family or friends.
  
• Never or rarely doing homework, or rarely talking about homework.
• Having low confidence or lacking self-esteem – your child might say she is ‘dumb’, ‘stupid’ or not as clever as her friends.
• Being kept back at lunch time or the end of the school day.
• Finding excuses not to go to school or skipping school without your knowledge.
• Being bored with school work or not feeling challenged enough – your child might say he’s not learning anything new.
• Having attention or behavior problems.
• Being bullied or bullying others.

Sometimes, problems at school will be easy to spot, and your child will willingly talk to you about them.

           But some children hide problems from their parents, teachers and peers. They might copy homework, pretend to be sick during important tests, or not bring reports home. This can make it very difficult for you to pick up on a problem. Sometimes even teachers might not spot the clues – especially if your child is absent a lot.

Causes of school problems

• Behavioral or developmental difficulties.
• Poor communication skills.
• Poor social skills.
• Difficulty with listening, concentrating or sitting still.
• Disliking, or not feeling connected to, the school culture or environment.
• Disliking school subjects, not liking the choice of subjects, or not feeling challenged by the work
• Not getting along with teachers or other students at school.
• Parents who aren’t involved in their child’s education.
• Family problems such as relationship breakdowns.
• Competing demands on time, such as extracurricular activities.
• Skipping school because of any of the reasons listed above.       

Parents contact a counselor -psychologist,to help their children with a variety of issues, such as academic achievement,student crisis situations,personal/social. 

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parenting tips

Ten Keys to Positive Parenting

1. Communication

 Have good communication. This requires the active listening and responding of at least two people. Take time to hear what each other is saying.Have good communication. This requires the active listening and responding of at least two people. Take time to hear what each other is saying.

2. Be Supportive 

Show support in a child’s hobbies and interests. Spend time with them on hobbies and encourage exploring their interests.

3. Set Rules 
Have household rules. Make sure the rules are clear for every member of the family. Apart from being clear, see that they follow the rules.

4. Correct your Child 

Teach the difference between right and wrong. When a mistake is made, correct the child, but do not overreact.  Praise freely whenever good is seen.

5. Appreciation
Appreciate the value of play. It is a child’s work. Playing with a child will give a parent a chance to prevent some discipline problems and make it easier (and funnier) for children to learn.

6.Have Family Get Together 

Arrange time for family activities. Children need to have some special time with parents. When there is more than one child in the house, make time for each child individually. Try to make these times special.

7.Healthy Food 
Build a healthy body and brain. Provide healthy food and plenty of water. Avoid junk food. Get active as much as possible. Turn off the television and video games and get outside.

8.Never embarrass your child
Don’t embarrass your child. If you embarrass your child especially in front of others, it will hinder future open talks.

9.Be a Good Listener  
 You need to learn how to listen carefully, not just to the words but the heart. Listening attentively is the key to healthy communication. You can listen actively.  Repeat what the child has said to avoid misunderstanding.

10.Show Interest 
Show a genuine interest in your child and his activities. This would help your child learn to express how he feels. Pay attention when your child talks. Good communication brings mutual understanding.

Come and improve your quality of life with us
             Hello Psychologist Child Development Counseling Center Lucknow

Call For Appointment=   9415370790, 9369160546

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Why Children's Lies

Why Children's Lies  

When children begin to lie purposely, there may be several reasons:

1. •To play with you;
2. •Because he thinks it is funny;
3. •To gain control of you or a situation;
4. •To avoid punishment;
5. •To cast blame on someone else;
6. •Because of fear or anxiety;
7. •To avoid doing something they do not want to do Because of jealousy. 
8. •Fear. When kids are scared of the consequences of their actions, they often lie to cover up. (Are the rules too strict? Are the limits too tight? Does your child feel free to talk with you?)
9. •To protect somebody else.
10. •Because she is imaginative and the truth is boring.
11. •To avoid an unpleasant task. (“Did you brush your teeth?” “Yes, Dad!”)
12. •By mistake. Sometimes lies seem almost involuntary, and a lie just slips out, especially if your child gets caught in a misdeed.
13. •For love, for approval, and because kids like to impress people quickly and effectively
14. •cover something up, hoping to avoid consequences or punishment                               
15. •explore and experiment with their parents’ responses and reactions
16. •exaggerate a story or impress others
17. •gain attention, even when they’re aware the listener knows the truth
18. •manipulate a situation or set something up – for example, saying to grandma, ‘Mum lets me have lollies before dinner’.
19. •Some kids lie because they feel that they are not meeting their parent's expectations. Are you putting too much pressure?                         
20. perform academically, athletically, or in other ways? Are your expectations realistic for a child that age?
21. •Sometimes, parental consequences are too harsh. A child may lie to avoid a punishment that he feels is unfair. 
22. •Children may lie to protect a friend or family member.  
23. •A child may lie to preserve his self image.                                        

BY :=

Namrata Singh

Child Psychologist

mail us....- namm.psychologist@gmail.com