Mutism in Children

Selective Mutism  in Children

Children and adults with selective mutism are fully capable of speech and understanding language but fail to speak in certain situations, though speech is expected of them. The behaviour may be perceived as shyness or rudeness by others. A child with selective mutism may be completely silent at school for years but speak quite freely or even excessively at home. 

Selective mutism is  characterized by the following ways:

 Consistent failure to speak in specific social situations (in which there is an expectation for speaking, e.g., at school) despite speaking in other situations.
 The disturbance interferes with educational or occupational achievement or with social communication.
 The duration of the disturbance is at least 1 month (not limited to the first month of school).
 The failure to speak is not due to a lack of knowledge of, or comfort with, the spoken language required in the social situation.
 The disturbance is not better accounted for by a communication disorder (e.g., stuttering) and does not occur exclusively during the course of a pervasive developmental disorder,schizophrenia, or other psychotic disorder. Shyness, social anxiety, fear of social embarrassment, and/or social isolation and withdrawal
 Difficulty maintaining eye contact
 Blank expression and reluctance to smile
 Stiff and awkward movements
 Difficulty expressing feelings, even to family members
 Tendency to worry more than most people of the same age
 Desire for routine and dislike of changes
 Sensitivity to noise and crowds
 Moodiness
 Sleep problems, Adjustment Problem 

Selective mutism is not a communications disorder and is not part of a developmental disorder. By definition, selective mutism does not include children with conduct disorders, oppositional/defiant behavior, and/or attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder.

The principal problem in children with selective mutism appears to be anxiety. This anxiety (which causes avoidance) seems closest to the definition of social anxiety disorder (social phobia). Indeed, most adults with social anxiety disorder relate strongly and can fully understand selective mutism, even though they themselves were not necessarily children with selective mutism.

Do's and Don'ts for Parents Treating your Selectively Mute Child
• Do learn what “enabling” is.
• Do not ask your child if he or she is going to speak in a given situation.
• Do learn a methodology of “empowering” your child’s potential and initiative.
• Do not continue “enabling” your child’s “addiction to the avoidance of speaking”.
• Do learn to employ a “matter of fact” set of expectations for your child that will facilitate the process of trying to talk.
• Do not show anger when your child is not talking.
• Do learn to be on the same “team” with parenting technique.
• Do not plead with your child to talk.

• Do attentively and patiently listen when your child is attempting to communicate.
• Do not reward your child for talking.
• Do learn to extract thoughts and feelings regarding fear from your child.
• Do not impatiently finish your child’s sentences or encourage over-dependence.
• Do learn to advocate on behalf of your child with school.
Hypnosis is also very useful in these type of problems. 
Thank

Dr.Shweta singh

    Guest Lecturer,

   Dpt. of Applied Psychology,

   V.B.S.Purvanchal University

   Jaunpur,U.P.,INDIA 

     mail- shweta_opsingh@rediffmail.com

Separation Anxiety in children

Separation Anxiety in children

“Separation anxiety is the constant fear of home separation, parents refusal, divorce parents. ”

Separation anxiety has peak age in 12 years to 16 years.

Reason of separation anxiety: -

Excessive love and affection from parents

Excessive control from parents

Lack of confidence in public performance

Any physical disorder

Over protection from family and society 

Symptom during separation anxiety:-

1. Refusal to bed without being near and attachment person

2. Getting up frequently during night to check or to sleep an attachment person

3. Refusal to sleep away home

4. Fear of being alone 

5. Repetitive nightmare

6. Repetitive occurrence of physical complain like – nausea , vomiting , headache, pain in several region of body

7. Excessive need to talk to parents 

8. Social withdrawal 

9. Anxiety 

10. Crying 

11. Avoid to go school

Impact over personality :-

• Development of mental stress

• Fear to make decision making

• Fear to be independent 

• Develop dependency over alcohol and other related drug

• Development of introverts behavior

• Lowering of social life

• Lowering in self confidence 

Remedy and therapy –

Counseling by psychologist

Use of cognitive desensitizing technique

Learning of stress reducing technique like relaxation technique  

Psychological test like deep personality analysis 

Change in social and family support 

Family counselling 

Thanks

Effect-Fashion

Effect of Fashion on Child Development and His Cognition

 “Fashion is a general term for a popular style or practice, especially in clothing, footwear, accessories, makeup, or furniture. "Fashion" refers to a distinctive; however, often-habitual trend in a look and dress up of a person, as well as to prevailing styles in behavior”

Ok friend I hope you understand the meaning of fashion and its related term but here I am raising a big issue which is the other side of the fashion that is NEGATIVE IMPACT OF FASHION OVER OUR MINDS. As we all know brain is just a complex neurological system and work with synaptic connections, as we develop and grow, we slowly develop new connections every single day, this generally called learning. During my practices of child psychology I had seen some of major and drastic changes, in the behavior of children’s , which seriously affecting the normal growth of children’s . Some of them are;-

1)    Peers Pressure

2)    Anorexia

3)    Habit Of Stealing

4)    Unable To Manage Money

5)    Low Self Image

6)    Low Concentration

1)- Peer Pressure –

As all know the power of peer pressure, it create constant obsession in the mind of the child to make him superior over other , when we talk this in fashion prospective  it get slightly toward lethal side, child get easy influence with T.V , friend and surrounding . They follow the style, look , manner of behavior and start a fantasy life which harm when we grow and unable to maintain the same level of effectiveness.

2)- Anorexia-

Eating disorder is directly connected with the development psychological aspect of the personality.  In this problem child see the magazines , news papers and get impressed by celebrities and try to look and wear as same as there hero’s,  they try to force their self physically to maintained their look and feel respected. But when this process goes long it creates a kind of obsession in the mind the child. He may try to escape meal and force his body to fit in the fram of celebrity, this is a disorder and it would lead person toward personality problems.  

3)- Habit Of Stealing –

All type of fashion need money , in our region (INDIA) the concept of pocket money is very limited, the children get only the basic  but for the fashion stuff money is required that’s why money arrangement is the big issue  so I had seen some case that child developed stealing habit and lying.

4)- Lower Money Management –

Because of the content obsession of new cloth, new style , children just unable to develop senses of saving and always feel that they need more money, this sense lower the saving thinking.

5)- Low Self Esteem:-

When there is constant need to look better, feel amazing, the strive go endlessly gratification and slowly this develop a sense of inadequacy and child develop feeling that he don’t look better, he wouldn’t have such magical personality, cloth and status which give him name and fame then a constant low feeling develop and this will create a low self stem child development, which is very harmful of the development of the personality.    

6) - Low ConcentrationLevel;-

Effect of fashion over academic is now quite normal child slowly distracted toward fashion and social attention and he lose steam of study, it directly affect over concentration level which lower our capacity to memorize thing, this lower concentration reduce the chances of success in academic areas of the child.

Thank

Rajesh C.Pandey

Child Psychologist & Career counselor

www.careerbreeder.com

Child Depression

Child Depression 

1. Often undiagnosed, depression in kids is often treated as 'the blues'. It is more difficult to identify depression in children, but there are common signs that adults can look at. These symptoms are show below:
2. The child is always sad, and he always feels worthless and guilty;
3. There is an observed frequency in complaints about physical illness, such as headaches, stomachache, toothache, muscle pains, and tiredness;
4.  Poor performance in school and lack of interest in learning are shown. Sometimes, poor performance becomes drastic;
5. The child expresses concerns about running away from home or expresses this through jokes;
6. Observed behavior in shouting and complaining is frequent. The child cries without explanation or reason;
7. Observed behavior of boredom and lack of interest in many activities that are deemed normal. These activities are the same activities that most kids his age enjoy;
8.  Poor communication skills, which often lead to isolation from social groups;
9. Observed sensitivity to failure and rejection;
10.  Feelings of anger and hostility are observed to increase;
11. Behavior becomes more and more reckless and uncaring;
12. There is an observed change in physical health, such as weight; there is also an observed loss of appetite and sleep;
13. Suicidal thoughts  are present. This is often verbalized or expressed in drawings.

please watch your child 

Suicide-Children

child suicide 

This is a topic no one likes to discuss, and no parent wants to even talk, but suicides in children and young people do happen. While older adults are far more likely to commit suicide than children, according to statics suicide is the third major cause of death in young children .

Suicide Risk Factors
Mood disorders such as depression, bipolar disorder, and severe anxiety disorders along with an alcohol or substance abuse disorder are the biggest risk factors for suicide.

The top two most important risk factors for suicide for girls is major depression and a previous suicide attempt. For boys, the top risk factor is a previous suicide attempt, followed by depression, disruptive behavior, and substance abuse.

There are several warning signs that someone may be at increased risk of suicide, and they are:

suicide notes — these should always be taken seriously

threatening suicide — direct or indirect

previous attempts of suicide

depression, particularly in the presence of thoughts of helplessness and hopelessness

risk-taking behavior, particularly anything involving gun play, aggression, or substance abuse

making final arrangements — this might involve giving away prized possessions

efforts to hurt themselves, such as self-mutilating behavior and self-destructive acts

inability to concentrate or think rationally

changes in physical habits and appearance, such as insomnia or hypersomnia (sleeping far too much), sudden weight gain or loss, disinterest in basic hygiene

great interest in death and suicidal themes — it might manifest in their journal, school papers, drawings

sudden changes in friends, personality and behavior, or withdrawal from family and friends

increased interest in things dealing with suicide — a sudden interest in guns or other weapons, pills, or even alluding to suicidal plans

vulnerable teens and young adults swayed by media reports of celebrity suicides, or the romanticized representation of suicide in movies and television

low levels of communication between parent and child — family discord has not been decisively shown to be a major risk factor for suicide, but it further exacerbates other problems such as depression, alcohol and drub abuse

being bullied or victimized, or being a bully
Unfortunately, many family and friends are left completely bewildered and shocked by the suicide of a young person. It is not uncommon for families to never learn what brought someone to take their own life.

Parents, caregivers, and teachers are the best observers of an adolescent's behavior, and the best judges of suicidal tendencies in children and young adults. If you notice any of the above risk factors, notify your physician, the school counselor, or take them to see a mental health professional immediately. Don't dismiss your instincts or their feelings. If you think something is wrong, it probably is.

THANKS 

online career counselling

Behavior Problem In Gifted Children's

Behavior Problem In Gifted Children's 

The term "gifted" is applied to children who learn at an above average rate. the child who have more then 150 IQ level would come in this category and this is really a good news for the parents who have such kind of child but this also bring special care and attention to the child. higher intelligence also create some really big problem to the parents here we have tried to mention some of the problem which we have seen in our clients.

Perfectionism

A gifted child may strive for perfection in all of his work, which can trigger him to the top of the class. But perfectionism can have its disadvantages. Perfectionism can sometimes lead to anxiety and depression. The constant need to be perfect at schoolwork and beyond can cause your child to feel anxiety before a test or project is due. Depression can follow a less-than-perfect performance, leaving your child upset for days following.

Sensitivity

Gifted child may sometimes suffer from intense sensitivity because of her knowledge base and acute senses. They might include a scratchy tag inside a shirt or lights that are too bright. This sensitivity can be related to a general over-excitability and interest in the world around her.

Restlessness

Being in a class that doesn't challenge him can cause a gifted child to feel restless and act out while in the classroom. When your child is always the first to finish an assignment, or his teacher purposely overlooks him to give another child the chance to answer, it can cause him to feel frustrated or anxious. It's why gifted children are often misdiagnosed as children with Attention Deficit Disorder or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, when the restlessness really stems from not being challenged on a daily basis.

Social Awkwardness

Your child's academic gifts can make it hard for her to relate to other children her age. When she is more excited by learning numbers or words, she may learn to take refuges in her books over spending time being social.  This, in turn, makes it even more difficult to see peers as her equals. This can result in paralyzing shyness or awkwardness.

LOW IMMUNITY LEVEL:- low body immunity is the big problem in the gifted child we are searching the reason behind that but this is also a crucial issue and parents have to aware about this.

Thanks

Child Sex Abuse

Child Sex Abuse :- Psychological Tips To Save 

Child sexual abuse is a form of child abuse in which an adult or older adolescent uses a child for sexual stimulation. Forms of child sexual abuse include asking or pressuring a child to engage in sexual activities (regardless of the outcome), indecent exposure (of the genitals, female nipples, etc.) with intent to gratify their own sexual desires or to intimidate or groom the child, physical sexual contact with a child, or using a child to produce child pornography. 

Protecting Children From Sexual Abuse-

 The typical advice "Don't Talk to Strangers" doesn't apply in this case. Most sexual perpetrators are known to their victims.

 Do not instruct children to give relatives hugs and kisses. Let them express affection on their own terms.

 Teach your children basic sexual education. Teach them that no one should touch the "private" parts of their body. A health professional can also help to communicate sex education to children if parents are uncomfortable doing so.

 Develop strong communication skills with your children. Encourage them to ask questions and talk about their experiences. Explain the importance of reporting abuse to you or another trusted adult.

 Teach your children that sexual advances from adults are wrong and against the law. Give them the confidence to assert themselves against any adult who attempts to abuse them.

 Make an effort to know children's friends and their families.

 Instruct your child to never get into a car with anyone without your permission.

 Teach your children that their bodies are their own. That it is OK to say they do not want a hug or that certain kinds of contact make them uncomfortable.

 It is important to remember that physical force is often not necessary to engage a child in sexual activity. Children are trusting and dependent and will often do what is asked of them to gain approval and love.

Thanks 

Dr.Shweta singh

    Guest Lecturer,

   Dpt. of Applied Psychology,

   V.B.S.Purvanchal University

   Jaunpur,U.P.,INDIA 

     mail- shweta_opsingh@rediffmail.com

Good Parenting

Good Parenting 

Raising children, especially in this day and age, is not an easy task. But, if you start out from their birth on the right track, even though there will be bumps in the road along the way, it is still possible, even now, to set them on the path to being decent human beings. Being a parent is one of the most fulfilling experiences a person can have. The most important thing a parent can give their child, however, is a sense of being loved. Just keep in mind that you don't have to be infallible to be a "perfect" parent.

1. Have patience-  The main ingredient in the recipe for a “good parent” is patience. If you want them to turn out well in the end, you have to know, up front, what kind of people you want them to become and set out to teach them how to be it. But it takes patience because they are going to fight you every step of the way. But at the same time don’t be afraid to make mistakes. As long as your children get the basics, they are going to be OK. A few mistakes along the way are not going to change the end result.

2. Do not fight or argue with each other in front of the children- First of all fighting with each other about something but then sticking concerning your child is going to make it look to the child as tough your “united front” is only “united against” your child. The object is to show your children a loving unity that includes them. So, curb your temper. Your children are going to be subjected to enough fighting when they get to school and then out into the World. Let your home be their refuse where they know they are safe and all is well. Especially do not argue with each other over something concerning the children in front of them. If you disagree with each other on something, discuss it out of their hearing so that they do not know you were not united on the decision.

3. Teach your children manners- Teach them to say please and thank you, to open doors for people, to let’s go first, to share, to not interrupt when someone in talking, to be polite, to have respect.

4. Teach your children the difference between right and wrong- That’s not as simple as it sounds, but you know the difference between right and wrong, then you can teach it to your children. Teach them that every action, good or bad, has a consequences and they must be willing to accept that consequence. Teach them that they must learn to look at the consequences of an action and then decide whether they want to accept that consequences before they do not action. Teach them that if they don’t know what the consequence of something would be, they should ask you about it before they do it.

5 Express your love and affection-    A gentle cuddle, a little encouragement, appreciation, approval or even a smile can go a long way to boost the confidence and well-being of your children. Tell them you love them every day. Love them unconditionally; don't force them to be who you think they should be in order to earn your love. Let them know that you will always love them no matter what.

6 Praise Your Children- Avoid comparing your children to others, especially siblings. Each child is individual and unique. Teach your children that it is okay for them to be different, and they do not have to follow the crowd. Teach them right from wrong when they are young, and they will (more often than not) be able to make their own decisions, instead of listening to/following others. Remember that your child is not an extension of yourself. Your child is an individual under your care, not a chance for you to relive your life through them.

7 Avoid Criticism- When your child acts out in a harmful and spiteful manner, tell him or her that such behavior is unacceptable and suggest alternatives. Avoid statements such as: "You're bad." "Go away!", etc. (as difficult as it may be to remain positive) . Avoid public humiliation. If they misbehave in public, take them aside, and scold them privately.

8. Be consistent-   Enforce rules that apply to every person leading a happy and productive life  Enforce the same rules all the time, and resist your child's attempts to manipulate you into making exceptions. Communicate clearly. Children should be very familiar with the consequences of their actions. If you give them a punishment, be sure they understand the reason and the fault, if you cannot articulate the reason and how they are at fault the punishment will not have the discouraging effects you desire.

9. Listen to them- Express interest in your children and involve yourself in his and her life. Create an atmosphere in which they can come to you with a problem however large or small.

10. Provide Order- Set boundaries such as bedtimes and curfews, so they learn that they have limitations. By doing so, they actually get a sense of being loved and cared about by their parents. Encourage responsibility by giving them jobs or "chores" to do and as a reward for those jobs give them some kind of privilege (money, extended curfew, extra play time, etc.).

11. Spend quality time with your children- Spend a lot of time with your kids and love them with all your heart. Try to divide your time equally if you have more than one child.

 Written By :-

   Dr.Shweta singh

    Guest Lecturer,

   Dpt. of Applied Psychology,

   V.B.S.Purvanchal University

   Jaunpur,U.P.,INDIA 

     shweta_opsingh@rediffmail.com

THANKS 

Under Stand ADHD

Under Stand ADHD in Childrens's/ Teenagers

Understanding ADD / ADHD:-

Attention deficit disorder is not just a problem in children. If you were diagnosed with childhood ADD/ADHD, chances are, you’ve carried at least some of the symptoms into adulthood. But even if you were never diagnosed with ADD/ADHD as a child, that doesn’t mean you can’t be affected by it as an adult.

ADD / ADHD: It’s not just for kids

Attention deficit disorder often goes unrecognized throughout childhood. This was especially common in the past, when very few people were aware of ADD/ADHD. Instead of recognizing your symptoms and identifying the real issue, your family, teachers, or other parents may have labeled you a dreamer, a goof-off, a slacker, a troublemaker, or just a bad student.

Alternately, you may have been able to compensate for the symptoms of ADD/ADHD when you were young, only to run into problems as your responsibilities increase. The more balls you’re trying to keep in the air—pursuing a career, raising a family, running a household—the greater the demand on your abilities to organize, focus, and remain calm. This can be challenging for anyone, but if you have ADD/ADHD, it can feel downright impossible.

The good news is that, no matter how it feels, the challenges of attention deficit disorder are beatable. With education, support, and a little creativity, you can learn to manage the symptoms of adult ADD/ADHD—even turning some of your weaknesses into strengths. It’s never too late to turn the difficulties of adult ADD/ADHD around and start succeeding on your own terms.

Myths and Facts about ADD / ADHD in Adults

MYTH: ADD/ADHD is just a lack of willpower. Persons with ADD/ADHD focus well on things that interest them; they could focus on any other tasks if they really wanted to.
FACT: ADD/ADHD looks very much like a willpower problem, but it isn’t. It’s essentially a chemical problem in the management systems of the brain.

MYTH: Everybody has the symptoms of ADD/ADHD, and anyone with adequate intelligence can overcome these difficulties.
FACT: ADD/ADHD affects persons of all levels of intelligence. And although everyone sometimes has symptoms of ADD/ADHD, only those with chronic impairments from these symptoms warrant an ADD/ADHD diagnosis.

MYTH: Someone can’t have ADD/ADHD and also have depression, anxiety, or other psychiatric problems.
FACT: A person with ADD/ADHD is six times more likely to have another psychiatric or learning disorder than most other people. ADD/ADHD usually overlaps with other disorders

MYTH: Unless you have been diagnosed with ADD/ADHD as a child, you can’t have it as an adult.
FACT: Many adults struggle all their lives with unrecognized ADD/ADHD impairments. They haven’t received help because they assumed that their chronic difficulties, like depression or anxiety, were caused by other impairments that did not respond to usual treatment.

In adults, attention deficit disorder often looks quite different than it does in children—and its symptoms are unique for each individual. The following categories highlight common symptoms of adult ADD/ADHD. Do your best to identify the areas where you experience difficulty. Once you pinpoint your most problematic symptoms, you can start to work on strategies for dealing with them.

Common adult ADD / ADHD symptoms: 

Trouble concentrating and staying focused
Adults with ADD/ADHD often have difficulty staying focused and attending to daily, mundane tasks. For example, you may be easily distracted by irrelevant sights and sounds, quickly bounce from one activity to another, or become bored quickly. Symptoms in this category are sometimes overlooked because they are less outwardly disruptive than the ADD/ADHD symptoms of hyperactivity and impulsivity—but they can be every bit as troublesome. The symptoms of inattention and concentration difficulties include:

“zoning out” without realizing it, even in the middle of a conversation.
extreme distractibility; wandering attention makes it hard to stay on track.
difficulty paying attention or focusing, such as when reading or listening to others.
struggling to complete tasks, even ones that seem simple.
tendency to overlook details, leading to errors or incomplete work.
poor listening skills; hard time remembering conversations and following directions.
Common adult ADD / ADHD symptoms: Hyperfocus
While you’re probably aware that people with ADD/ADHD have trouble focusing on tasks that aren’t interesting to them, you may not know that there’s another side: a tendency to become absorbed in tasks that are stimulating and rewarding. This paradoxical symptom is called hyperfocus.

Hyperfocus is actually a coping mechanism for distraction—a way of tuning out the chaos. It can be so strong that you become oblivious to everything going on around you. For example, you may be so engrossed in a book, a TV show, or your computer that you completely lose track of time and neglect the things you’re supposed to be doing. Hyperfocus can be an asset when channeled into productive activities, but it can also lead to work and relationship problems if left unchecked.

Common adult ADD / ADHD symptoms: Disorganization and forgetfulness

When you have adult ADD/ADHD, life often seems chaotic and out of control. Staying organized and on top of things can be extremely challenging—as is sorting out what information is relevant for the task at hand, prioritizing the things you need to do, keeping track of tasks and responsibilities, and managing your time. Common symptoms of disorganization and forgetfulness include:

poor organizational skills (home, office, desk, or car is extremely messy and cluttered)
tendency to procrastinate
trouble starting and finishing projects
chronic lateness
frequently forgetting appointments, commitments, and deadlines
constantly losing or misplacing things (keys, wallet, phone, documents, bills)
underestimating the time it will take you to complete tasks

Common adult ADD / ADHD symptoms:
 Impulsivity
If you suffer from symptoms in this category, you may have trouble inhibiting your behaviors, comments, and responses. You might act before thinking, or react without considering consequences. You may find yourself interrupting others, blurting out comments, and rushing through tasks without reading instructions. If you have impulse problems, being patient is extremely difficult. For better or for worse, you may go headlong into situations and find yourself in potentially risky circumstances. You may struggle with controlling impulses if you:

frequently interrupt others or talk over them
have poor self-control
blurt out thoughts that are rude or inappropriate without thinking
have addictive tendencies
act recklessly or spontaneously without regard for consequences
have trouble behaving in socially appropriate ways (such as sitting still during a long meeting)
Common adult ADD / ADHD symptoms: Emotional difficulties
Many adults with ADD/ADHD have a hard time managing their feelings, especially when it comes to emotions like anger or frustration. Common emotional symptoms of adult ADD/ADHD include:

sense of underachievement
doesn’t deal well with frustration
easily flustered and stressed out
irritability or mood swings
trouble staying motivated
hypersensitivity to criticism
short, often explosive, temper

low self-esteem and sense of insecurity

Common adult ADD / ADHD symptoms:

 Hyperactivity or restlessness
Hyperactivity in adults with ADD/ADHD can look the same as it does in kids. You may be highly energetic and perpetually “on the go” as if driven by a motor. For many people with ADD/ADHD, however, the symptoms of hyperactivity become more subtle and internal as they grow older. Common symptoms of hyperactivity in adults include:

feelings of inner restlessness, agitation
tendency to take risks
getting bored easily
racing thoughts
trouble sitting still; constant fidgeting
craving for excitement
talking excessively
doing a million things at once

You don’t have to be hyperactive to have ADD / ADHD

Adults with ADD/ADHD are much less likely to be hyperactive than their younger counterparts. Only a small slice of adults with ADD/ADHD, in fact, suffer from prominent symptoms of hyperactivity. Remember that names can be deceiving and you may very well have ADD/ADHD if you have one or more of the symptoms above—even if you lack hyperactivity.
Effects of adult ADD / ADHD
If you are just discovering you have adult ADD/ADHD, chances are you’ve suffered over the years for the unrecognized problem. People may have labeled you “lazy” or “stupid” because of your forgetfulness or difficulty completing tasks, and you may have begun to think of yourself in these negative terms as well.

Untreated ADD/ADHD has wide-reaching effects
ADD/ADHD that is undiagnosed and untreated can cause problems in virtually every area of your life.

Physical and mental health problems. The symptoms of ADD/ADHD can contribute to a variety of health problems, including compulsive eating, substance abuse, anxiety, chronic stress and tension, and low self-esteem. You may also run into trouble due to neglecting important check-ups, skipping doctor appointments, ignoring medical instructions, and forgetting to take vital medications.
Work and financial difficulties. Adults with ADD/ADHD often experience career difficulties and feel a strong sense of underachievement. You may have trouble keeping a job, following corporate rules, meeting deadlines, and sticking to a 9-to-5 routine. Managing finances may also be a problem: you may struggle with unpaid bills, lost paperwork, late fees, or debt due to impulsive spending.

Relationship problems. The symptoms of ADD/ADHD can put a strain on your work, love, and family relationships. You may be fed up with constant nagging from loved ones to tidy up, listen more closely, or get organized. Those close to you, on the other hand, may feel hurt and resentful over your perceived “irresponsibility” or “insensitivity.”
The wide-reaching effects of ADD/ADHD can lead to embarrassment, frustration, hopelessness, disappointment, and loss of confidence. You may feel like you’ll never be able to get your life under control. That’s why a diagnosis of adult ADD/ADHD can be an enormous source of relief and hope. It helps you understand what you’re up against for the first time and realize that you’re not to blame. The difficulties you’ve had are symptoms of attention deficit disorder—not the result of personal weakness or a character flaw.

Adult ADD/ADHD doesn’t have to hold you back
When you have ADD/ADHD, it’s easy to end up thinking that there’s something wrong with you. But it’s okay to be different. ADD/ADHD isn’t an indicator of intelligence or capability. Certain things may be more difficult for you, but that doesn’t mean you can’t find your niche and achieve success. The key is to find out what your strengths are and capitalize on them.
It can be helpful to think about attention deficit disorder as a collection of traits that are both positive and negative—just like any other set of qualities you might possess. Along with the impulsivity and disorganization of ADD/ADHD, for example, often come incredible creativity, passion, energy, out-of-the-box thinking, and a constant flow of original ideas. Figure out what you’re good at and set up your environment to support those strengths.
Self-help for adult ADD / ADHD
Learn to recognize & reduce hidden stress

 Help 

Armed with an understanding of ADD/ADHD’s challenges and the help of structured strategies, you can make real changes in your life. Many adults with attention deficit disorder have found meaningful ways to manage their symptoms, take advantage of their gifts, and lead productive and satisfying lives. You don’t necessarily need outside intervention—at least not right away. There is a lot you can do to help yourself and get your symptoms under control.

Exercise and eat right. Exercise vigorously and regularly—it helps work off excess energy and aggression in a positive way and soothes and calms the body. Eat a wide variety of healthy foods and limit sugary foods in order to even out mood swings.
Get plenty of sleep. When you’re tired, it’s even more difficult to focus, manage stress, stay productive, and keep on top of your responsibilities. Support yourself by getting between 7-8 hours of sleep every night.
Practice better time management. Set deadlines for everything, even for seemingly small tasks. Use timers and alarms to stay on track. Take breaks at regular intervals. Avoid piles of paperwork or procrastination by dealing with each item as it comes in. Prioritize time-sensitive tasks and write down every assignment, message, or important thought.
Work on your relationships. Schedule activities with friends and keep your engagements. Be vigilant in conversation: listen when others are speaking and try not to speak too quickly yourself. Cultivate relationships with people who are sympathetic and understanding of your struggles with ADD/ADHD.
Create a supportive work environment. Make frequent use of lists, color-coding, reminders, notes-to-self, rituals, and files. If possible, choose work that motivates and interests you. Notice how and when you work best and apply these conditions to your working environment as best you can. It can help to team up with less creative, more organized people—a partnership that can be mutually beneficial.
When to seek outside help for adult ADD / ADHD
If the symptoms of ADD/ADHD are still getting in the way of your life, despite self-help efforts to manage them, it may be time to seek outside support. Adults with ADD/ADHD can benefit from a number of treatments, including behavioral coaching, individual therapy, self-help groups, vocational counseling, educational assistance, and medication.

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