Wednesday 20 November 2013

Concentration Building Techniques for Kids with ADHD

5-Concentration Building Techniques for Kids with ADHD

Imagine that you are living inside of a video game, where everything is coming at you at once and every sight, sound and sensation is a distraction. For a child with ADHD, getting through a typical day is something like that—and it explains a great deal about how they experience the world. Children with ADHD typically have impairment of functions such as concentration, memory, impulse control, processing speed and an inability to follow directions. If you’re a parent of a child with ADD or ADHD, this most likely sounds all too familiar. Over the years, you've probably struggled through homework sessions with your child, tried (and failed) to get them to complete certain tasks like cleaning their room or finishing yard work, and on more than one occasion, you've probably felt completely drained by their high energy and seeming inability to focus.

The good news is, there is something you can do to help your ADHD child improve their concentration skills. For years it was thought that each of us was born with a generous supply of brain cells, but that we were unable to produce additional cells or make changes in how they function. Fairly recently, neuroscientists discovered the presence of something called “neuroplasticity” which enables the brain to actually grow additional cells or modify the function of existing cells. Amazingly, cognitive exercises have been found to produce desired changes in not only how the brain works, but how it looks.

Exercises that help ADHD kids improve their concentration.


1. The Coin Game: This is one of the games that we use in the Total Focus Program. Parents like it because it improves memory and sequencing as well as attention and concentration, and kids enjoy it because it’s fast-paced and fun. First, you will need a small pile of assorted coins, a cardboard sheet to cover them, and a stopwatch (or a regular watch with a second hand.) Choose five of the coins from the
pile (for this example, we’ll say three pennies and two nickels) and put them into a sequence. Now, tell your child to “Look carefully at the coins arranged on the table.” Then, cover the coins with the cardboard. Start the stopwatch, and then ask them to make the same pattern using the coins from the pile. When they are finished, mark the time with the stopwatch and remove the cardboard cover. Write down the time it took them to complete the pattern and whether or not they were correct. If they didn't complete it correctly, have them keep trying until they can do it. You can increase the difficulty of the patterns as you go, and include  nickels, dimes, quarters, and half dollars. You’ll see your child’s concentration and sequencing improve the more they play, which is a great reward for both of you.


2. Relaxation and Positive Imagery: Combining simple relaxation techniques such as deep breathing with positive visual imagery helps the brain to improve or learn new skills. For instance, research shows that if a person mentally practices their golf swing, the brain actually records the imaginary trials the same as if they were real trials which leads to improvement on the golf course. So ADHD kids can “imagine” that they’re paying attention in class or able to handle teasing, and this can in turn change their behavior at school. You and your child can use your own creativity and give this a try.


3. Mind - Body Integration: An example of this technique would be to have your child attempt to sit in a chair without moving. The parent times how long the child is able to accomplish this.Repeated practice over several weeks will show improvement. Through this activity, the neural connections between the brain and body are strengthened, providing improved self-control.




4. Crossword Puzzles and Picture Puzzles:  It sounds simple, but these are great tools for kids with ADHD. Crossword puzzles actually improve attention for words and sequencing ability, while picture puzzles—in which your younger child has to look for things that are “wrong” in the picture or look for hard-to-find objects—also improve attention and concentration.
5. Memory and Concentration Games: Children’s games such as Memory or Simon are great ideas for improving memory and concentration. They are quick and fun. Memory motivates the child to remember the location of picture squares and Simon helps them memorize sequences of visual and auditory stimuli. Through repeated playing, brain circuits are “exercised” and challenged, which strengthens connections and thus improves function. Also, there are some free computer games on the internet that also improve concentration or memory such as Memory and Mosquito Killer. For older children and adolescents

As you do all of these “brain exercises,” you should work together with your child serving as his or her “coach.” Provide them with encouragement and track their progress as they improve. This is a win/win solution, because it also strengthens the relationship you have with your child.

Go ahead. Have some fun. Do the exercises along with your child, and who knows, you may find your brain will work a little faster and smarter, too!


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Wednesday 18 September 2013

concentration problems in children


  • Short attention span.
  • Easily distracted by other people/noises.
  • Difficulty focusing and sustaining focus.
  • Shifting focus (moving attention from one thing to another).
  • Failing to give close attention to detail, making careless mistakes.
  • Appearing not to listen when spoken to directly.
  • Difficulty following instructions.
  • Failing to finish tasks (not because of fractious behaviour or failure to understand instructions).
  • Difficulty organizing tasks.

  • Avoids, dislikes or is reluctant to engage in tasks that require sustained mental effort.
  • Loses things necessary for tasks (files or books).
  • Forgetful in daily routine.
  • Inability to keep still in seat.
  • Leaves seat in situation in which remaining seated is expected.
  • Excessive talking.
  • Impulsive – acting before thinking.
  • Interrupting others.
  • Children have more difficulties with work completion, productivity, planning, remembering things needed for school, and meeting deadlines.
  • Children start beating about the bush just to avoid writing or reading, when parents teach these children.
  • If children are asked to finish their homework within a specified time, they just fail to meet the deadline.

  • On being asked to read aloud, these children just stop in the middle and parents need to keep reminding the children every time they stop.
  • Making disruptive noise, leaving their seats unexpectedly, speaking out of turn, disturbing classmates, and not completing classwork are typical 

If any parents see near to all problem in his child then they must think to consult a child psychologist for the proper evaluation and management.

Come and improve your quality of life with us---
         Hello Psychologist Child Development Counseling Center Lucknow

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Sunday 21 July 2013

How to Handle Sibling Rivalry



Sibling Issues 

Raising one child is challenging in our fast-paced society. Raising more than one child brings added joys, and often, difficult feelings that start with the older child and eventually infect the younger child too.
Those feelings can be lifted by a few important strategies which, employed early and
often, can clear the way for rich, playful, and loving relationships between children. Since these strategies are not the typical, "Don't do that or I'll send you to your room" approach, they are challenging to use. But the results they bring over time are deeply rewarding.


Preparation for a brother or sister

Every child has longings for more time and more closeness with their parents! These longings are a big part of why it's hard to want to go to bed at night, hard to get dressed to go to day care or to Grandma's, and why it can even be upsetting to see Mommy or Daddy cuddling or talking on the telephone! Every child needs a chance to air his feelings about wanting more, indeed, about wanting all your time and attention.


 The first is to offer him Special Time during which you pour on your attention, your approval, and your closeness. You allow your child to choose what play he wants to do with you.
You can start Special Time by saying expectantly, “OK, we have fifteen minutes, and I'll play with you any way you want to!” with a lively tone. Then, keep your attention focused on your child. Let the phone ring, and postpone your need to get a cup of tea during this time.

It's surprisingly hard to do for us—because parenting is stressful, we almost always try to teach, try to direct, or try to get little jobs done while we're playing with our children! What Special Time does is to help your child, and you, too, notice that you are paying loving attention and letting him make decisions for awhile.


The second step is to notice when your child longs for exclusive closeness with you. Is it when new people are around? Is it when you both arrive at day care or at the grandparents' house? Is it at bedtime, with pleas for story after story to keep you close?
When a child feels upset about a possible separation, however minor it may be, his feelings of needing you are ready to be released. He needs the reassurance that you love him and the chance to cry as long as possible to drain the reservoir of sadness about you going.
Playfully with the older child

After a new sibling had arrived, an older child's feelings will be both large with love and wonder, and tight with upset about his sibling's intrusion into his relationship and time with you. One of the more fruitful ways to handle this is to find a way to play "I want you!" with your older child as often as possible.

"I want you" games come in a hundred variations. You could begin by getting down on the floor and announcing, “I have a hundred kisses for you! Where shall I start?!” and crawling awkwardly toward your child. You can make great efforts to get him and cuddle him, and then he can wriggle away and dance just out of reach, laughing while you try to deliver your kisses. 

The laughter your child does while you playfully show that you can't live without him heals some of the hurt of seeing you attending the other child so often and so lovingly. And it gives you a delightful way to openly appreciate your older child.
Special Time will also help you center your attention on your older child at regular intervals during the week, helping both him and you to plump up your relationship and remember the love you have for each other.


Notice what goes well      
           
Brothers and sisters want to get along. They want to have fun with each other. Often, we parents are so relieved to have things going well between our children that we don't notice the details of the generous and flexible moments between them. We use the times that go well between them to get our housework or phone calls or schoolwork done.

If you look carefully, you'll see sharing, assistance, and thoughtfulness at moments and in places you hadn't noticed before. Sometimes, these moments of brotherly and sisterly genius take place a split-second before the relationship deteriorates into a tangle.
In spite of what follows, those few seconds were an effort, and an achievement. Your appreciation of the positive is a help to your children's relationship. “Jacquie, thanks for bringing your sister the brush. Now can you let her do her hair herself?” helps a child feel seen. Her effort to help is real, even if her follow-through leaves something to be desired.


When your child needs you and you can't help right away

When children cry for more closeness, or get upset because you can't help them right away, we have an excellent chance to help them to fully release the sadness they feel. When your older child feels needy, you can send him an invitation to be close.
A loving look or a tender word, an invitation to come and snuggle your back or sit on your feet or be embraced by your one free arm says, "I want to help" even when you can't.

If your child begins to tantrum or cry, an excellent thing is happening! He's using the offer of closeness that you gave as the sweetness he needed to begin to release his pent-up feelings of upset. Sometimes children "work on" their feelings of helplessness, too, and feel like they can’t walk over to you.
After they've cried a while, they'll rediscover their ability to walk again, and will have worked through some outdated feelings that were making them whiny and hard to live with.


Crying and tantrums heal the hurt, although by all appearances, your child feels worse than ever while it's happening. If you keep offering loving words and gentle looks while he works his feelings through, he'll feel closer to you and much relieved when he's done, and he won't be blaming his unhappiness on his sibling. His unhappiness will have been scrubbed away by the heartfelt emotional work he just did.

Key to this strategy is your understanding that your love is enough, even when you can't help right away. Your attention during an explosion of feelings (even from the other side of the room) is noticed by your child. Your voice and your eyes will convey your caring, and help to right the wrongs that your child is feeling.
You are not neglecting him, nor are you causing more pain. While you patiently listen to a crying or tant ruming child, you are doing a good job as a parent, and your child is doing a good job of getting rid of the bad feelings he doesn't want to live with.


What about the disputes?

In every family feeling of frustration and competition for attention and for toys disturb siblings' good intentions sooner or later. When there's a tug-of-war over you, or over a desired thing, you can help your children by listening the feelings through.
Children can tolerate necessary unfairness as long as the feelings of frustration or insult are heard. Feelings that are listened to all the way through are feelings that evaporate afterward.

When you listen to crying or frustration, the child lets the awful feeling out, and your attention and caring then flow in. So siblings can get back to loving each other, even when you can't give them the same experiences, or the same amounts, or the same time, or the same toys.



A policy that reduces tension over time

The policy I like best about disputed items is that the child who has the item gets to keep it until he's done. Meanwhile, the parent "helps the other child wait" by making sure he is gently held if he tries to grab.
The parent listens to the child's upset while he feels like he's never going to get his turn. The crying or tantrum drains the "I'm a victim" feelings, the "I never get what I want" feelings, and the "It isn't fair" feelings that often infect a sibling relationship, and turn it into a real power contest every day. All the parent needs to do is to listen to the feelings, and to keep giving the reassurance that, “You'll get a turn. He won't keep the red bike forever.”

As you'll see, the "unfairness" of Jasmine getting to the puzzle first today will let Jacquie work on her upsets, and Jacquie getting to the swing first tomorrow will let Jasmine work on her upsets. Cry by cry, both children have a chance to have your company and closeness while they work out their upsets about the other.
Gradually, over time, this helps siblings develop patience and trust that, even if they can't have what they want right now, they are loved and will get a turn later. You have children who love each other, and by listening, you're helping them move big chunks of negative feelings out of the way of that love. The fun will follow.


When both children are pulling hard on the same item, an unusual but very effective strategy is to put your hand on the desired item, too, and say, “I'm sure you can figure out how to share this. I'm not going to let either of you grab it right now. You can figure this out.”
Lots of crying and heated feelings will follow, and when one or the other child has cried enough to think clearly, a solution will appear. One child will decide to wait, or they'll begin negotiating with each other. It's so difficult to resist clamping a solution onto the problem right away!

But allowing them to cry hard about their heated wants will make cooperation far more likely. And you won't be required to keep the peace between them, once they've cried enough to come to their own solution.

We adults have been trained to try to solve the dispute quickly so the feelings will subside. It's an emotional challenge for us to take the unusual tack that the feelings are the real issue, not the disputed item.
When we listen instead of legislating turns, we bring our children some moments to feel loved while they feel sad or angry. This love and reassurance while they are upset sticks with them far longer than the five minutes of (usually defensive) fun with the toy, after which they are tense again over when they will get their next five minutes.


When one sibling is harsh toward another


Children who touch too roughly, or hug too tightly, or hit or poke or hurt their siblings are sending clear signals that they have some upsets that need to be listened to. Even very young children can be gentle with younger ones; as long as they are feeling "filled up" with attention, and relaxed.
So any sign of harshness from one sibling to another can be taken as a sign that the child is not feeling connected or relaxed enough to function thoughtfully. When you notice that a child has been rough, scolding him or ordering him to do things correctly won't help. This only frightens your child more, and makes it less likely that he'll be able to act thoughtfully.

What does help is to move in quickly and gently.
Very gently but firmly stop the tense child from touching the younger child, but don't remove him. Say, “I'll help you be next to Sammy,” and guide his hands or his kisses so that they land softly, Move so that you can make eye contact with the older child, and invite him kindly to take a look at you.
Usually, because the child is tense with upset, he can't look at you for long, and when he tries, the upset begins to make him want to go away. Gently stay with him and keep him close, continuing to let him feel your attention and your support.

Usually, the child will move rather quickly into a tantrum or a big cry about wanting you or not wanting you, or about wanting to touch the baby, or not wanting the baby. All those feelings are important facets of the nugget of upset he's trying to offload. If you stay with him, without criticism, he'll be able to cry or tantrum it through.


When our children hurt each other, we need help ourselves


Seeing one sibling hurt another is one of the most trying times in our lives as parents. It makes us feel like we aren’t succeeding at the really important part of parenting. And often, it sets us up to be harsh toward the child who did the hurting, even though we love that child deeply.
Sometimes, when the hurting has become frequent, almost habitual, sibling troubles infect the way all the members of the family feel all of the time. As hard as these times are for us, we need to keep the perspective that they happen in just about every family.

Perhaps we’ll come to a time in human history when life is so gentle that sibling aggression is rarer, but we’re not there yet.

One difficulty we have in finding good ways out of sibling tangles, little or big, is that we parents generally haven’t seen parents handle sibling difficulties without harshness.
It feels like harshness is necessary, even justified, to get the aggression to stop. But if we reason things through, it’s hard to see how harshness from a grownup could beget love and tenderness between children. There must be a better answer.

And there is, but it’s not easy. I think the most effective answer lies off the beaten path of a parent’s life. Since it works so well, here goes.

When our children begin to fight and it creates upset in the family, it’s time for the parent looking for a solution to find a listener. Parents with fighting siblings get upset. Upset people don’t solve people problems well.
We have to be able to win the hearts of our children back to us, before they can love each other well again. And to win a child’s heart, a grownup needs to shed his doubts about the goodness of the child. When our children fight, it’s easy to lose sight of the fact that they are good children.

When they fight, at least one of them is experiencing a blackout in his thinking. He hasn’t stopped being a good person, he’s just stopped thinking. It happens to us every day too. For example, when our children fight, we often stop thinking.

So a good first move is to find someone who can, without interruption, judgment, or advice, listen to you talk about the child who gets lost in upset.
Some of the things to talk about are:


What was it like for you and that child when he was born?
When he was an infant?
What was the last time you really felt close to him? Enjoyed him?
What do you feel like doing when he hurts his sibling? What do you do?
What would have happened to you if you had acted like he does when you were a child?
What do you worry about?
What hurts you or angers you when you see your children fighting?

Telling someone about each of these threads of experience and feeling will help. If you can show some of the feelings that arise, all the better. The feelings are sitting there, waiting for release.
Sometimes, it helps to talk about the situation several times. Don’ make your children listen to the stories you have. They are best saved for other adults.

Your child is good
 Sooner or later, every child with siblings gets upset with his brother or sister. But try to keep a good perspective: even when consumed with big feelings, your child is good. He's signalling you for help as clearly and as vigorously as he knows how.
You may need some listening time from another adult to remember his goodness. Once your own upset isn't throbbing, you'll again be able to spend one-on-one time with him, a good first step toward healing his aching heart.


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Tuesday 18 June 2013

Best Child Psychologist Doctor in Lucknow-9415370790

Child psychologist may work with a range of clients including toddlers, children and teens, or they may specialize in working with a particular age group.his or her focus will be on helping understand, prevent, diagnose and treat developmental, cognitive, social and emotional issues..like---

  • Career Confusion
  • Weak in studies
  • Academic Underachievement 
  • Exam Stress
  • Concentration problems
  • Study related issues
  • Time management problem
  • Performance anxiety
  • Emotional and Behavioral issues
  • Temper Tantrums (anger)
  • Adjustment Problem
  • Anxiety
  • Depression
  • Loneliness
  • Inferiority Complex
  • Low Self confidence
  • Bed Wetting
  • Sibling Jealousy
  • Hyper Activity (ADHD)
  • Attention Problem
  • Slow Learning 
  • Identity Confusion 
  • Peer Problems 
  • Victims of Sexual Assault or Sexual Abuse 
  • Speech problem in child
Dr.Rajesh C. Pandey
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Dr.Namrata Singh
      Child Psychologist
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If any parents see near to all problem in his child then they must think to consult a child psychologist for the proper evaluation and management.


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Monday 13 May 2013

parenting tips

Ten Keys to Positive Parenting

1. Communication
 Have good communication. This requires the active listening and responding of at least two people. Take time to hear what each other is saying.Have good communication. This requires the active listening and responding of at least two people. Take time to hear what each other is saying.

2. Be Supportive 
Show support in a child’s hobbies and interests. Spend time with them on hobbies and encourage exploring their interests.









3. Set Rules 
Have household rules. Make sure the rules are clear for every member of the family. Apart from being clear, see that they follow the rules.




4. Correct your Child 
Teach the difference between right and wrong. When a mistake is made, correct the child, but do not overreact.  Praise freely whenever good is seen.









5. Appreciation
Appreciate the value of play. It is a child’s work. Playing with a child will give a parent a chance to prevent some discipline problems and make it easier (and funnier) for children to learn.



6.Have Family Get Together 
Arrange time for family activities. Children need to have some special time with parents. When there is more than one child in the house, make time for each child individually. Try to make these times special.





7.Healthy Food 
Build a healthy body and brain. Provide healthy food and plenty of water. Avoid junk food. Get active as much as possible. Turn off the television and video games and get outside.






8.Never embarrass your child
Don’t embarrass your child. If you embarrass your child especially in front of others, it will hinder future open talks.












9.Be a Good Listener  
 You need to learn how to listen carefully, not just to the words but the heart. Listening attentively is the key to healthy communication. You can listen actively.  Repeat what the child has said to avoid misunderstanding.








10.Show Interest 
Show a genuine interest in your child and his activities. This would help your child learn to express how he feels. Pay attention when your child talks. Good communication brings mutual understanding.







Come and improve your quality of life with us
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Saturday 27 April 2013

How to deal with lying child and teenagers



There may be many reasons why your teen is lying and you need to know the real reason behind the lie. The reason may be wrong crowd or defensive nature. You have to work on the real reason so that you can manage his lying behavior. There may be any reason behind the lying attitude but you may have to face serious consequences because of this attitude. Here is a list of facts that can teach you how to deal with lying teenagers.


First of all you should accept that your teen will lie. This understanding makes the things easy for you and you can confidently deal with your teen. Your objective behavior makes you more aware and you can easily identify when your teen is lying.
  • Lying attitude is most commonly associated with defensive nature. If your child becomes defensive during communication then he is lying with you. 
  • Maintain an eye contact with your teen for checking his confidence. If he is telling lie then he looks in other directions and avoids eye contact with you. They usually shout for convincing you that they are telling truth.
  • Body language and details also reflects the attitude of the lying teenagers.  Teens normally avoid giving details when they are lying or they unnecessarily give you explanation for unwanted things. Their story normally changes every time when you ask them to repeat it again. He also becomes nervous when he is telling lie.

  • If it is suspected that your kid is lying then you should give immediate attention for avoiding the worst situation in the future. Make them realize that you trust them and their lie is making the relationship weaker among them. You should not become rude when your teen is telling lie. In fact handle the situation with love and great care. Your rude behavior can encourage him for telling more lies in the future.

  • Parents should also teach their teens the meaning of a true and respectful relationship. Parents should also be honest for their teens because children learn a lot from their parents. You can easily make the situation under control if you take hand to take action at that time. Parents should also know how to deal with this tough situation. Your immediate attention can make the situation under control soon and child also tries to give his best for meeting the expectation of the parents.

  • You should not jump immediately that your teen is telling lie every time. Analyze the situation carefully and try to understand it deeply. When you are sure about the fact that your teen is telling lie only then you should take some action.

  • One you are sure about the reason why teen is telling lie then you should work on the cause so that lying attitude can be avoided in future.






    If any parents see near to all problem in his child then they must think to consult a child psychologist for the proper evaluation and management.


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